i came across a message today, it was sent from a friend, one that i hold in high regard. the contents of the message seems innocent at first, quite probably just like the intentions when the message was written. Nevertheless, it troubles me. Greatly. Talking and responding to such a serious matter with an offhanded (and probably with out much thinking) remark was not what i expected from that particular person, not from this person. Maybe i'm just too sensitive at the moment, but i could not help thinking further about this.

Have we all been disconnected from the ideals we once proud to stand for? Of Camelot? No matter how much i disbelieve such an utopia could exist, i still hope for its existence. Certainly not in my lifetime, nor the generation after. Are we so disconnected that we assume everyone came from the same background, bias, perspective as us? Or have we become so resentful, even hatefull of our existence within this world that we could not see beyond our own terrible existence? I quite expected this from myself, but from others, whom should i say, more fortunate than me, and quite possibly, more humane, honestly no. . Is this what 'humanity' means now?

We speak of diversity, of understanding and caring, yet we never could uphold this ideals in reality. Not doing anything is just as wrong as doing the deed itself, for through impunity/passiveness/inaction we voiced our silent agreement to the action. Or have we simply lost the common decency to feel for another, the empathy to feel joy and sorrow of another human being?

I remember a quote from "Nuremberg". In one scene, after interviewing the German generals captured at the end of world war 2, a jewish US Army officer concluded that the one trait that connects all the high ranking officials and the nature of Nazi Germany was, in his conclusion their obvious lack of empathy for the Jewish prisoners. These prisoners are simply regarded as 'insignificant'. He also concluded, If one were to define evil, then it is the lack of empathy.

This fact is what disturbes me greatly. Have the person i hold dear for their capacity of empathy lost their most essential of human qualities? I dare not say, but my mind riddles with this question over and over. If there is a god, i hope this is just a lapse of judgment. If one that is highly regarded and priveleged,just like the generals was in wartime Germany, could think such a think in today, what does that tell us? That the hopes and lessons of the past have been easily forgotten, and millions have died in vain? I firmly believes no matter how much hatred and anger you felt towards a person, that doesn't condone disrespect or injustice to that person, ever.

If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us do we not laugh? If you poison us do we not die? And if you wrong us, shall we not revenge?
-William Shakespeare

If this true, and we do not try to stop this, at least in our personal space/reality, than i fear that the we are doomed. That we all deserve the ugliness of the world, the anger and hatred we lock away at night but lingers still within. We deserve evil, because we have brought it upon ourselves, in greater number and scale than what have been previously recorded in the history of mankind.

i fear this ranting of a madman will only fell on deaf ears.

Once i still hope, but now 'tis lost forever.
For my dreams have become nightmares
And the nightmare became real
Thus my existence ended
For i am the Heart of Darkness.
I know no fear,
But rather instill it in my enemies.
I am the destroyer of worlds.
I am the fire of hate, anger, rage.
All the Universe bows before me.
I pledge myself to the Darkness.
For I have found true life,
In the death of the light